Meditation (Day 141)

Prep (0830)

Going to try out filling it out in Notion instead of daily diary (as I may soon stop doing the public diary).

Motivations:

• Practice intentionality
• Unity of mind
• See how far the stages take me
• overcoming illusion of self
• Subduing distractions

Intentions for the day:

• Eyes closed
• Prep posture and then set intention to sit still
• Body scan to increase mindfulness (stage 5 exercise)
• Immediately notice and correct for subtle dullness (stage 5 intention)
• Clearly establish scope of attention and completely ignore all subtle distractions (stage 6 intention)
• Move, grow, and shrink scope of attention (stage 6 exercise)
• Especially ignore posture distractions
• Before starting to focus on meditation object, cultivate joy

Distractions to look out for:

• Body-scan
• Posture
• Lower back
• Shoulder
• Swallowing
• Planning
• Meta
• Politics
• American Horror Story
• Reflection
• Timer
• Labeling
• Wife
• Cat
• Outside

Post-Meditation (1130)

Hypnagogic thoughts again. It's really interesting how much I can observe them. Unsure about subtle dullness, but my intention to immediately notice and correct for subtle dullness definitely flares up. I think it's just a weird thing my mind does in general when it quiets down?

Still learning to completely ignore subtle distractions. I feel regular surges when a distractions pokes attention and them my intention reasserts itself. Sometimes it's wordless and sometimes its recanted in the mind. I know I'm sitting so much stiller today than before, and that it's getting consistently more still, but I'm so aware of it now that it still feels like a struggle. Which is probably good, I think, it's keep my "sit still" setup in intentional practice as I head towards mastery. Also, my posture is just so much better now. Pain is no longer worrisome, just sometimes present and a subtle distraction that's safe to learn to ignore completely.

Meditation continues to be super excellent. Though the progress is super awesome, the effect as it is right now is worth it.

I'm also making time for analytic meditation, which right now has purely been for work, though tomorrow (this weekend), I may try pointing it at random items of interest and see what insights come.

Dream

Intention (2306 the night before)

Lucid dream is coming. I can feel it. I will visit my aunt's house. I will WBTS. Dreams will be remembered and saved in writing.

Let's go!

Wake (logged at 0630 this morning)

I have a couple dreams in there, I know, but having trouble retrieving them now that I have pen and paper in hand.

One involved Blockbuster in some way.....

(Remembered a bunch of dream here and wrote it down immediately.)

It's amazing how finding a detail unlocks the dream sometimes. Can I find a detail for the other dream. I woke up around 0530, and heavily considered a WBTS. But knowing I would wake at 0630, I didn't want much less than an hour of sleep to go. In my mind, I made a mental WBTS note, which of course I don't remember.

There was, I think, a fragment of a dream in that mental note. Oh, well. I think maybe the lesson is quick note is better than nothing if I don't want to spend too much time in WBTS.

Special Controller at Blockbuster

I am at Blockbuster. There's a wooden stand controller adapter for a Switch game. I already have one, but am wondering if I should get a second one for the wife.

Someone else recently got a console for his 10 kinds, I assume used, and is asking about getting the wood structure adapter which didn't come with his console.

The adapter costs about as much as the console. A clerk helps grab all the pieces for construction fro the person. They're all splayed out and must be grabbed individually, even the manual.

I explore the store. There's a demo of the wooden structure with Mario Kart. It holds a steering wheel for you. This is next to a box bundle to get the game, console and structure parts together. The box is huge.

That's all I remember.

Pre-nap (1310)

Pretty tired. Sleep quantity was slightly diminished last night. Anyways, there's a meeting in 20 minutes. Let's nap!

Post-nap (1329)

Thought about:

• weekend Tuesday
• paid off for life

Also, some work processing that can stay in the background.

Misc Writing

Liking the new writing setup, I think. Will try out the Notion tonight. Will start it before I get to bed.