Timeblock
| Time (PST) | Plan | Reality |
|---|---|---|
| 0000 | SLEEP | |
| 0030 | SLEEP | |
| 0100 | SLEEP | |
| 0130 | SLEEP | |
| 0200 | SLEEP | |
| 0230 | SLEEP | |
| 0300 | SLEEP | |
| 0330 | SLEEP | |
| 0400 | SLEEP | |
| 0430 | SLEEP | |
| 0500 | SLEEP | |
| 0530 | SLEEP | |
| 0600 | Buffer | SLEEP |
| 0630 | Morning routine block | Meditation |
| 0700 | Reading: Book | Morning routine |
| 0730 | Planning | Calling aunt |
| 0800 | Stretching | Reading: The Mind Illuminated |
| 0830 | Stretching | Planning |
| 0900 | Stretching | Notion tasks |
| 0930 | Stretching | |
| 1000 | Appointment: Psychiatrist | |
| 1030 | Buffer | Stretching |
| 1100 | Just Dance | Notion tasks |
| 1130 | Shower/maintenance | Work Notion |
| 1200 | Lunch | |
| 1230 | NAP | Lunch |
| 1300 | Buffer | Talking |
| 1330 | Work: OpsLead | NAP |
| 1400 | Work: OpsLead | Work: Maintenance |
| 1430 | Work: OpsLead | Work: Debugging |
| 1500 | Work: OpsLead | Work: OpsLead |
| 1530 | Buffer | Work: Slack |
| 1600 | Meeting: Medtitation | Reading: The Mind Illuminated |
| 1630 | Music with wife | Work: OpsLead |
| 1700 | Cooking: Mac and cheese | |
| 1730 | Cooking: Mac and cheese | |
| 1800 | Side-projects | TV: The Legend of Korra |
| 1830 | Side-projects | Music with wife |
| 1900 | Hanging out | TV: The Legend of Korra |
| 1930 | Hanging out | Reading The Mind Illuminated |
| 2000 | Hanging out | TV: YouTube Cosmonaut |
| 2030 | Winding down | TV: YouTube Cosmonaut |
| 2100 | SLEEP | |
| 2130 | SLEEP | |
| 2200 | SLEEP | |
| 2230 | SLEEP | |
| 2300 | SLEEP | |
| 2330 | SLEEP |
Thinking
Fun terms from the book (that I read a while ago but didn't write down here):
- following: noting the various starts and ends of the stages of the meditation object (when does your in-breath start/end, out-breath start/end, and how long are the pauses between the two)
- connecting: contrasting the various stages of the meditation object (is your in-breath longer than your out-breath, is the pause before the in-breath longer than the pause before your out-breath)
- labelling: give your distractions short names, this helps you notice which are more regular and which are rarer, and which are likely to take the center stage of your attention
Also useful: as a beginner, narrating your observations in the mind is fine. Eventually, you want to observe wordlessly, but learning to keep attention is worth the words in the beginning. I believe you can also do all of the above wordlessly as well, but right now for me it's pretty wordy (but already getting less wordy). (edited)
I'm pretty sure I'm safely in Stage 2 already (interrupted attention and overcoming mind-wandering). There are some hints of Stage 3 (extended continuity of attention and overcoming forgetting). I don't think I lost the meditation object today/yesterday, but I may have just not noticed? It's reasonably short if I have.
Don't think I'm in Stage 4 (continous attention and overcoming gross distraction and strong dullness). Various gross distractions occur, even if I'm not forgetting the breath. Also, I think in this stage I achieve a lot less thinking in words. It has shrunk considerably but still quite present. Further, I haven't even experienced dullness yet. Not that I've noticed. Definitely not sleepy during meditation yet, either.
I anticipate my momentum to slow pretty soon as well. I think I had accidentally done some early meditative stuff when dealing with ADHD, but I think I'm fast approaching the limits of that experience. We'll see. I'm fine with slow progress. Will not rush things. Even though 15 minutes went real easy, will still wait until Sunday before increasing it to 20. Might make the intervals between increasing the meditation timer shorter thereafter, but I think I should choose that after the first meditation I do with extended time.
Dream
Yet again, my dream came back to me during meditation. I let it sit in the background. Not all of it came back, nor as much as yesterday's, but I do remember watching a movie in a theatre with a friend. A character in the movie was called "Weaselman", and I have a friend whose nickname is that. I talked to my friend how it's cool, as we both knew Weaselman.
I think I'll send a chat to Weaselman.
ADHD Medication Reflection
I am on the 26th day of adhd medication and things have settled into a good place. Just had a follow-up with psychiatrist, and he anticipates that a stronger dose will be necessary eventually but for now sticking to the current dose seems like a solid plan. Gave up caffeine the first week on the medication, but added it back in without incident.
Still very able to choose to do things, which means learning to pace myself in a different way than before. Burnt out on work the first week, though luckily that was before the 4-day weekend, and I burnt out on the Thursday. Have noticed that intellectual feedback makes its way to the subconscious better than before. So, intending to do things leads me to doing them sooner and making habits stick or fade faster. E.g. started stretching everyday, last week I picked back up a reading habit, and last Friday I started meditating.
Pretty solid and exciting.