Timeblock
| Time (PST) | Plan | Reality |
|---|---|---|
| 0000 | SLEEP | |
| 0030 | SLEEP | |
| 0100 | SLEEP | |
| 0130 | SLEEP | |
| 0200 | SLEEP | |
| 0230 | SLEEP | |
| 0300 | SLEEP | |
| 0330 | SLEEP | |
| 0400 | SLEEP | |
| 0430 | SLEEP | |
| 0500 | SLEEP | |
| 0530 | SLEEP | |
| 0600 | SLEEP | |
| 0630 | Meditation | |
| 0700 | Cooking/eating breakfast | |
| 0730 | Reading: The Wretched of the Earth | |
| 0800 | Family drama | |
| 0830 | Family drama | |
| 0900 | Morning routine | |
| 0930 | Meeting: Mixpanel Meditation | |
| 1000 | Meeting: MixAbility ERG Monthly | |
| 1030 | Spaced-repetition | |
| 1100 | Maintenance: Notion Tasks | |
| 1130 | Walk with wife | |
| 1200 | Lunch | |
| 1230 | TV: YouTube Overwatch | |
| 1300 | Stretching | |
| 1330 | Stretching | |
| 1400 | Meeting: Admin Weekly Sync | |
| 1430 | Maintenance: Notion Tasks | |
| 1500 | Work: Data Classification Thinking | Reading: The Case for Reparations |
| 1530 | Work: Data Classification Thinking | Cooking-related chores |
| 1600 | Work: Data Classification Thinking | Maintenance: Notion Tasks |
| 1630 | Buffer | Maintenance: Notion Tasks |
| 1700 | Cooking block | Talking with family |
| 1730 | Cooking block | Talking with family |
| 1800 | Buffer | Talking with family |
| 1830 | Music with wife | TV: Harley Quinn |
| 1900 | Side-projects | Hanging out |
| 1930 | Hanging out | |
| 2000 | Hanging out | |
| 2030 | Winding down | |
| 2100 | SLEEP | |
| 2130 | SLEEP | |
| 2200 | SLEEP | |
| 2230 | SLEEP | |
| 2300 | SLEEP | |
| 2330 | SLEEP |
Dream
I remember a dream within a dream and an argument with my dad. Not the content of the argument, but that I had one. That's it. Might've recovered more if I wrote it down after my morning meditation.
Meditation (Day 15)
I'm half a month into meditation now. With some difficult days under my belt, I am more confident that the meditation is helping. Specifically, I am more tired on days when my mind really wants to keep chewing on certain ideas, or keep flipping from ideas. I have been working diligently to be joyful when I realize I'm caught in this loop, even outside of meditation.
This intention has created a sort of "mini-meditation" habit wherein I go through the meditative joy formula: relax and look for joy; observe, let it come, let it be, let it go. There are things that I don't want to ever intentionally invest time in, and things that I do, but both in the moment are observed and let go. What matters is what I intend to do in the present. I can plan to tackle important things that come to mind later.
There is some family drama that has led to a heavier practicing of flexibility today. Yesterday is when it boiled over, but yesterday was set in motion and family drama wasn't something I was going to deal with properly. So I spent a small amount of necessary time on it, on purpose, and then I worked the rest of the day to let my subconscious mind process it. Often it bubbled into consciousness, but then I would repeat the mantra.
Today, the drama isn't done, but more work was necessary. Again, I intentionally spent some time on it, and outside that time I have been joyfully guiding my mind to other tasks as I realize I am dwelling on it.
I trust the subconscious mind to do a better job of processing. So far, it has done exactly that. So I get a better result and I have more energy to show for it. There did end up being a little bit of an analytic meditation on this drama this morning, though, which wasn't exactly on purpose (I wanted to keep the time investment today to an hour but it was an hour and a half), but it ended up being worthwhile and started whilst in a toggl timer devoted to this drama (so it was brain activity accurately tracked).
I think I'm dealing with this in a healthier manner, in a way that will end better for all involved parties, and with the ability to devote energy to other things.